I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing
by Tracy Space Cowgirl
Summary: Kyle thinks about his life when he can't sleep.


I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing
    
    by Tracy (biancaheart@yahoo.com)
    
    Rating : PG
    
    Category: K/I, FF
    
    Spoilers: "Graduation"
    
    Summary:  Kyle's midnight ramblings when he can't sleep.
    
    Disclaimer:  I do not own Roswell.  I love Kyle but do not own him.  If anyone wants to sell him, I am interested in buying.  I don't own the Aerosmith song either.  But I'm serious about the Kyle buying part. J

_I could stay awake just to hear you breathing   
Watch you smile while you are sleeping   
While you're far away and dreaming   
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender   
I could stay lost in this moment forever   
Every moment spent with you   
Is a moment I treasure _

It's New Years.

  
She fell asleep during Rudolph.

  
She never got to see the Shiny New Year.  She missed Ruldoph's overwhelming excitement.

  
She made your New Years shiny.

It hit you out of the blue.

  
Love.

It was insane.

  
It was asinine. 

  
She's married.

  
She's an alien.

Remember the last alien you let in your heart?  Remember how she ripped your heart out?  Remember how she killed Alex?  She might have killed you too, with all that mindwarping.  

  
Maybe that's why you feel like you're going crazy.

  
Isabel moves and you cover her.  

  
She snuggles up to you, and your heart feels like it will break out of your chest.

You love her.

  
You didn't plan it, and you're not sure if you want it.  

  
Love used to be simple.  Love was Liz Parker, the beautiful girl next door with brown hair and a sweet smile.  She kissed you in the Janitor's closet and you were happy.  You went to the Y pool.  It was serious for you.  Liz was waiting for something better.

You've known Isabel…you've known her for quite a while.  Since she started going to Roswell Elementary, whenever that was.  She was a cheerleader for your pee-wee football games.  

  
You liked her smile.

You became friends after Alex died.  When Tess was all gushy over Max.  Drank coffee in the bleachers and pulled jokes on Max.  Max deserved a little humiliation.

You kissed her once.

You were only in seventh grade, and it was during Spin the Bottle.  Dumb party game that you didn't really want to play- you were more interested in the Super Nintendo.  It was your first kiss, even though you don't acknowledge it.  All the other guys started kissing back in fifth or sixth grade.

Nothing ever came of that kiss.

You took Maggie Sherman to the winter dance that year.

Now you wonder if you had taken Isabel to the dance, if things were different, then maybe she would be wearing your ring on her finger.

Unrequited Love.

  
Kyle Valenti in unrequited Love.

  
When in the hell did you turn into Max Evans?

  
  


  
  
Don't wanna close my eyes   
Don't wanna fall asleep   
'Cause I'd miss you, baby   
And I don't wanna miss a thing   
'Cause even when I dream of you   
The sweetest dream would never do   
I'd still miss you, baby   
And I don't wanna miss a thing 

She's finally asleep.

You reached the hotel room, plopped your stuff down five hours ago.  A week of going non-stop across the US, fleeing Roswell like scared little bunnies.  

  
You don't even know where you are.

  
Liz and Max took one room, Michael and Maria took the other.

  
Darn even numbers.

She misses Jesse.

  
You reckon if you had a significant other- you'd be missing her.

Sometimes you dream of blond curls and blue eyes.  Until you remember what was behind them.   And you wake up screaming.

Your dad would hold you, sit you down and hand you a glass of warm milk.  Give you Mr. Squishels and put you back to bed.

  
You really miss that stuffed elephant.

Insomnia sucks.

You always wanted to get out of Roswell.  See the world.

  
Now you're scared out of your mind.

Of course, you never planned on having the FBI on your tail.  You never dreamed about being an alien.  Or turned into one.

You wonder how long it will take for you to spark.

You miss Alex.

  
He was someone to talk to.  A guy without alien powers who could just shoot the breeze.  Make you feel like you were back at Roswell Elementary and were King of the Jungle gym.

He was probably the closest thing to a best friend that you ever had.  None of your "friends" really got along with you well after Sophmore year.

  
Big shock.

  
And then there's Isabel.

  
When she cries about leaving Jesse behind, you want to take her in your arms and kiss away your tears.

  
She lets you hold her.

You hold her because she's the only thing you have left to hold on to.

Dad is in Roswell.  

  
Mr. Squishels is in Roswell.

You are somewhere in the middle of nowhere.

In a group of people, sometimes you feel so alone.

  
But you connect, on some level.

She sees you, in ways that the others can't.  

Sometimes when you hold her you get flashes of another planet. Of another place.  Of a lost little girl looking for home.  She is covered with jewels but alone.

  
She turns around and puts her arms around you in her sleep.

  
She probably thinks you are Jesse.

  
You don't care.

  
You except the warmth and listen to her breathe.

  
This feeling makes it worth it all.

  
_  
Laying close to you   
Feeling your heart beating   
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming   
Wondering if it's me you're seeing   
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together   
I just wanna stay with you   
In this moment forever, forever and ever_

  
You're married.

You wonder what your dad will think.

  
Life is good.

The FBI is still on your tail.  You still have no idea where you are.

  
She wears your ring on your finger.

  
You have no idea how you got to be so lucky.

  
Jesse was an idiot, you know that for sure.

  
He cheated on her.

You saw him when you first got to Boston, with that other girl.  His secretary, or whatever.  

You wanted to make him bleed.

You walked away silently.

  
You couldn't tell her.  She was so happy about seeing him again.  You just couldn't break her heart.

  
Your powers went haywire.  They were just new back then, and you couldn't handle them.  Things set you off pretty easily.  Meditation didn't work.  You were more of a walking time bomb than Guerin ever was.  

  
Liz was so worried.

Michael connected with you and tried to get you to calm down.

  
Then he wanted to kick Jesse's ass as well.

Then Max got involved and saw your vision as well.

And oh boy, did Hurricane DeLuca get riled up.

  
You were all piling into the van, not knowing exactly what to do, but you knew that you had to do something because he couldn't do something like that and just go and break her heart without paying for it.

That's the good thing about this family you now have.  The six of you would die for each other.  Your bond goes beyond friendship.  You love each other, the same silly, crazy, wonderful, dysfunctional love that a family has.  A family born of silver handprints and bullets.

  
You didn't go anywhere.  

Just as you were backing up, Isabel came back.

  
She found out the truth on her own.

  
That night, everyone stayed in one hotel room.  Nobody slept.

She leaned on you a lot.

And you were there for her.

And then, somehow, you ended up together.

  
Your friendship evolved.

Leaning led to hugging.  Hugging led to kisses on the cheek pretty often.  Cheek kisses led to short pecks on the mouth.  Then you began kissing in earnest, and from there you were gone.  That led to her getting your ring on her finger.

  
For the first time in your life everything is good.

Right now you are completely, utterly happy.

You love her.

  
She loves you back.

  
You could stay in this moment for the rest of your life.

  
  
_Don't wanna close my eyes   
Don't wanna fall asleep   
'Cause I'd miss you, baby   
And I don't wanna miss a thing   
'Cause even when I dream of you   
The sweetest dream would never do   
I'd still miss you, baby   
And I don't wanna miss a thing _

  
Her belly is rounded.

  
You are paranoid about sleep.

  
You don't want to miss a thing.

  
It fascinates you.

Being a father.

  
You miss your own father.  

You saw him last week, when he and Amy came to dinner.  

They're on their second honeymoon.

Hopefully they'll be back before the baby's born.

A little Valenti.

  
You've discovered that you love children.

  
Alex Evans is the cutest baby in the world.  Except for his unborn cousin.  You don't know if it is a boy or a girl.  You really don't want  to.  Max knows, which really pisses you off.  Michael probably knows too.  Max isn't such a Fort Knox of secrets if you get him drunk.

Even Isabel thinks you've gone over board on the baby stuff.  She calls you the Baby Nazi.

  
You taunt her back with the good old Christmas Nazi routine and she drops the whole issue.

This is normal.

As normal as a glowing stomach can be.

  
The blanket glows and you touch your hand to her stomach.  You feel your child touch you back.

This is the epitome of cool to you.

All the craziness that has been in your life, the alien related wackiness and the general kookiness that comes from being born in Roswell—it has all led up to this.

  
A greater meaning.

Isabel chides you for sleeping so late in the mornings.

But for you there is nothing better than watching her sleep.

  
  
_I don't wanna miss one smile   
I don't wanna miss one kiss   
I just wanna be with you   
Right here with you, just like this   
I just wanna hold you close   
Feel your heart so close to mine   
And just stay here in this moment   
For all the rest of time _

  
Crying wakes you up.

Isabel starts to stir, but you stop her.  You'll take this turn, you say.

You pick up your daughter.  

  
A head full of fuzzy blonde hair and big blue eyes.

If only she didn't have that habit of leaving silver handprints everywhere.

  
Now you understand why Max was so obsessed with finding his son.  Why he let Tess go back to Antar in the first place.  

This is love- a kind of love you've never known before.

Before he disappeared with the whole alien thing, your dad said he was in awe of you.  He said the same thing when you came back, after you outfoxed the Special Unit once and for all and where able to come home.

  
You are in awe of Aurora.

  
Her name comes from a Disney Princess.  Sleeping Beauty.  As a newborn, your daughter rarely sleeps.  But when she does sleep, she is as beautiful as her mother.

Aurora's name also comes from the stars- like that light you saw up north on your journeys.  The light you kissed Isabel under.  The Aurora Borealis. 

You can't wait to see her grow up.

See her turn Roswell Elementary upside down.

  
See her terrorize her cousins.

You don't want to think about her falling in love.  You don't want another guy to take her away, even though you know it will happen one day.  One day she won't be your baby girl anymore.

  
You listen to her heartbeat.

She will have everything she wants, everything she needs, you decide.  

  
You'll coach at her little league games…or watch her dance recitals, or whatever.  You'll be there and she will never ever feel alone.  

  
You are her Daddy.

  
This simple kind of love is perfection.

  
  
_Don't wanna close my eyes   
Don't wanna fall asleep   
'Cause I'd miss you, baby   
And I don't wanna miss a thing   
'Cause even when I dream of you   
The sweetest dream would never do   
'Cause I'd still miss you, baby   
And I don't wanna miss a thing _

It's your anniversary.  
  


There's a party in the Crashdown.

Jeff still owns the Crashdown, but Max and Maria are the ones in charge of running it.   Max does the books and Maria takes care of all the business decisions.

  
She is the one who got Tabasco on every table.

Your Dad and Jeff are playing guitars.  Knowing aliens does wonders for increasing your lifespan.

  
You are thankful that Maria is not up on stage, grinding with your elderly father.  You still remember that duet from years ago, even though you try hard to forget.  Some images just won't leave your mind.

Liz is a scientist, but truth be told, you're not really sure what she does.  Science was never your forte.

Isabel teaches at the Elementary school.  Plenty of past students are celebrating with you tonight.  Kids love her, and rightly so.

Twenty five years later, she still rocks your world.

  
Your children are dancing, laughing, and smiling.

Aurora, Sarah, Ethan, Evan, and Scott.

Aurora is going off to college next year in New York.  You don't want her to go.  

  
And truth be told, you are a little afraid of her graduation.  Just because the other kids have gotten through their ceremonies fine does little to reassure you.  You remember your own graduation, and you don't want that happening to your baby girl.

  
You'll bring the whole force of the Roswell Police Department on the Fed's ass if they do.  

  
You've fulfilled your duty becoming yet another Valenti in a long line of sherrifs.

  
And really, you don't mind.

Sarah is a fourteen year old tomboy with the most amazing pitching arm you've ever seen.  She'll probably be on the Houston Astros one day.  They do let girls on the team now.

  
Ethan and Evan are the most troublesome set of twelve year olds you've ever known. 

You wonder how your father put up with you.

He says that he finally got his wish- the classic one- "Kyle, I hope when you grow up that you'll have children just like you."

  
Their names are Ethan and Evan.  Maria refers to them as Mini-Kyles.

That almost makes you laugh.

Scott wasn't planned.  

He's only three.

  
You still have to keep him from putting things in his mouth.

  
He likes to turn Michael's hair purple.

  
That makes you laugh.

Michael never lives it down when he comes into the station with Purple hair.

  
You make sure of that.

He was the last person you expected to be your top deputy.

You like the fact that you can still drink him under the table.

A cake is brought out with a bride and groom alien on it.

Few people know how appropriate it is.

You kiss your soulmate.

  
Your children groan.

Things have really come full circle in your life.

  
All because of one day in the Crashdown.  Liz getting shot changed your life too.  For the better, now you can finally admit.

How many memories do you have in this restaurant?  Picking Liz up for your first date.  Interrogating the boy who would become your future brother in law.  Partying after hours with the gang.  Being attacked by aliens and finding out that all the humans in town had literally gone poof.  Dressing up for prom.  Your dad telling you Alex was dead.  Isabel and Jesse- you still get tense when you think of that man- their wedding reception.  Isabel giving birth to Aurora in the back, with Liz delivering her.  Sarah loosing her first tooth in one of Amy's pies.  The twins causing food fights with their cousins.  Finding out that Scott was on the way.

Memories.

Liz figured you out before anybody else.  She saw your inner Max Evans and called you on your attraction to Isabel.

  
You told her it was complicated.

Liz simply smiled and told you that if it wasn't complicated, then that person wouldn't be your soulmate.

Your life is complicated.

  
But wonderful.

  
You still don't like to sleep much.

  
Because life is beautiful, and you want to live it to the extreme. 

   
Don't wanna close my eyes   
Don't wanna fall asleep   
'Cause I'd miss you, baby   
And I don't wanna miss a thing   
'Cause even when I dream of you   
The sweetest dream would never do   
I'd still miss you, baby   
And I don't wanna miss a thing   
  
  



End file.
